John, you came. You finally came. Last night.
But it's hurter than what I've thought.
You said this. "You used to captivate me by your resonating light. As your wound won't seem to heal. There's just too much that time cannot erase. Because when you cried I wiped away all of your tears. Because as you screamed, I fought away all of your fears. And I held your hands through all of this while."
I just remember that all. But there're words--some words left. Like--"hate--left--" you just talked about him. And bla bla I can't remind. If only I could record that dream.
Why did you came saying all that to me? You did nothing. You and yourself said that. I'm not gonna pay your deeds even if you had made some. You said it was nothing. You did nothing. You just hurt me and foremost yes. You hurt me the most. I don't know why I have to feel so mad on you since you came. You just emerged and went off. Like I was a stump. A dead shadow. You're dead. It's you who are dead. Not me! Please don't say that again to me! You made me feel blamed! You made me feel jittery for this.
For losing you.
I tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone. As my bud had told me to. Because then I always hoped you'd come but you weren't coming. Until last night. In my dream. After I lost my hope.
Why did you do that? Don't you love me?
What do you mean to tell? Is there anything else you didn't tell? I thought we were family. We ARE family. A devastated family though.
But I love you. I've been alone all the time. I'm sorry for this.
It was your stupidity made me.